Lost in Troy


I’d discovered a long section of bicycle trail that I’d never ridden before. ?It originates in the little town of Piqua. ?It eventually connects with the rest of the Great Miami River Trail in Dayton.

The plan was to ride about 80 miles today, but I never got that far. ?For one thing, the forecast called for zero rain.

Uh huh.


It didn’t do anything?but?rain. ?In Troy, Ohio, I sat here:

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through an hour of the heaviest downpour, but finally had to get off my ass and get ‘er done.

I think part of the reason I never paid much attention to the trail there is Piqua is nearly a hundred miles from Columbus. ?Just not that much reason to travel that far to ride trails. Especially when there are so many nice places to ride far closer.

Anyway, it was a new experience. ?I got to see things I hadn’t seen before.

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That was in the middle of downtown Troy. ?Lincoln’s explaining the Gettysburg address to Perry Como. ?Seriously. ?And Lincoln / Como are 25 feet tall. ?Those lamps at their feet? ?They’re about six feet high. ?Here, let me show you. ?See the guys where the arrow is pointing:


Uhhh . . . these guys?


Union soldiers? ?

Necessarily, all of my rides are about testing out stuff. ?Today was a test of my new ultra cushy biking shorts. ?Happy to report they did just spectacular.

Something else I tested today:

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Don’t those legs look like that pink crap that McDonald’s uses to make chicken nuggets:


I was testing wearing sandals to bike. ?My feet get ungodly hot when riding. ?Can’t imagine how they’d fare in 100+ degree temperatures around the desert. ?Plus, when caught in the rain, tennis shoes soak right through and take forever to dry. ?There is as much tread on the bottom of my sandals as on the bottom of my tennis shoes, so why not let my toes roam free and sock-less? ?Pleased to report that just like the shorts, the sandals worked well. ?When it finally quit raining, the sandals air-dried by the time I got back to my car.


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Not quite sure how to explain this next part. ?In riding the trail through Troy, I had to ultimately abandon it and get on main surface streets. ?I somehow managed to get myself turned around so completely that I was locked into the city. ?I could not escape that town.

My inner compass was telling me to go X direction but Google Maps was telling me to go Y. ?But when I’d go Y Google’d would then freak out and say, “Wait a minute, go the other way!” ?The rain wasn’t helping one bit as I couldn’t get a fix on the sun.

This is part I can’t figure out how to explain. ?I remembered landmarks that I’d passed on my way in from Piqua. ?As I circled Troy for?the third time?the landmarks were?on the wrong side.

There was a house I noted the first time passing it as it was no more than 10 feet from the railroad track. ?I figured the resale value of the place at about $1.98. ?As I rode into Troy, the house was on the left. ?On one circuit, I was heading back into Troy . . . ?that damned house was on the?right?side. ?I felt like I was in a Twilight Zone episode. ?I figured at any moment Rod Serling was going to step out from a corn field and poke his cigarette into my eyes.

I blame a lot of it on this sign:

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This is impossible to tell from the picture above, but the trail actually forks into a Y right here. ?What you can’t see is the section that goes off to the left. ?I’m pedaling from the bottom of the picture. ?The sign?appears?to be pointing towards Tipp City (where I wanted to go) to the?right of the fork. ?(Which is how I went.)

The sign is facing the crux of the Y. ?It’s actually in the middle of the fork. ?To reach Tipp City I really needed to go?left. ?By going right, I wound up in a big circle, going right back to Troy again. ?It was a little frustrating.

But it was kind of fun to ride in the rain. ?Guess what new piece of gear I’d bought that I?didn’t?test out today?

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Yep. ?New rain jacket. ?Because the weather nerds called for a?zero?chance of rain.

Be nice if these clowns are just as wrong about 117 degree temps in Laughlin, NV. ?Knowing my luck, the actually temperature will be 217 . . .